DEI is now DEIAJB. This ain’t a game of checkers we’re playing here, no siree. This is chess, folks, and let me tell ya, the pawns are getting restless.

You see, it starts off simple enough. A group of folks get together with a common goal. “Save the whales!” they shout, or “Free the toe fungus!”. Okay, maybe not that last one, but you get the idea. Then, it starts to change.

It’s like they’re building a social justice Voltron or something. They start tacking on other groups, like some kind of twisted jigsaw puzzle. “Animal rights? Sure, you can join. Flat earth believers? Why the hell not! People for the ethical treatment of cockroaches? Come on in!”

Now, these new groups, they don’t share the same purpose. Heck, half of them don’t even know what the original purpose was. But they’re against the majority, and that’s good enough. They swell the ranks, make the movement look bigger, give it more muscle.

The whole thing becomes an unstable, schizophrenic mess. A walking, talking contradiction. But oh boy, does it have power. It’s got numbers, it’s got voices, it’s got signs and banners and hashtags. And it uses them all to take a swing at the so-called ‘normal’ folks.

And these ‘normal’ folks, they’re just trying to get by. They’re working, raising families, paying taxes. But now they’ve got this multi-headed monster bearing down on them, shouting about a dozen different causes, none of which make a damn bit of sense.

So what do we end up with? A world where the lunatics are running the asylum, and the sane folks are left scratching their heads. A world where every fringe group, no matter how outlandish, is given a megaphone and told to yell as loud as they can.

But hey, who needs coherence, right? As long as you’re loud and against the majority, you’re in. Doesn’t matter if you make sense, doesn’t matter if you’re relevant. Just pick up a sign, shout some slogans, and welcome to the movement.

Makes you miss the good old days, doesn’t it? When social movements were about something real, something that mattered. Not just a mishmash of every fringe group under the sun. But hey, I guess that’s progress. Or at least, that’s what they want us to believe as power is carefully shifted to the elites.

You see, once the bigwigs and top dogs get their shiny shoes in the door, they don’t just waltz in and make themselves comfortable. Oh no, they kick down the damn door, set up shop, and declare it’s permanent victory time. And you know how they do it? They build their base, brick by brick, from groups they’ve cozied up to. They drape them in gold, call them the foundation of society, and give them a pat on the back for good measure.

But here’s the catch: They don’t want functional systems. Nah, that’s old school. That requires work and responsibility. Instead, they want systems of entitlement. A “You scratch my back, I’ll scratch yours” kind of deal, but with one minor detail – they’re the only ones getting scratched.

They gather up the dysfunctional, the lost, the loyal, and promise them the world. “Obey us,” they say, “and we’ll make you kings and queens of your own little corners.” The loyalists, well, they lap it up, happy to get crumbs from the high table. And these crumbs? Just tiny fragments of the monstrous taxes squeezed out of the productive folks.

So here we have it, the grand inversion of society. A world where the unproductive are hailed as heroes, given the keys to the city, and the productive? They’re left holding the bill.

The irony of it all is that these folks, the new foundation, they aren’t builders. They can’t even hammer a nail straight. But they’re the ruling class’s chosen ones. Why? Because they’re loyal, because they’re obedient, and because they’re satisfied with crumbs.

Now, don’t get me wrong, I’m all for including everyone. Misfits, rejects, they all got a place. But it ain’t at the bottom, supporting everyone else. They should be out there, learning, growing, contributing. And if they can’t, or won’t, then maybe they’d feel more at home somewhere else. Somewhere like Venezuela, perhaps.

Let’s fix up their new expanded DEI acronym, sifting through the dumpster fire that is declining society, one ridiculous, nonsensical letter at a time.

We start with ‘D‘ for ‘Disunity‘. Now isn’t that a lovely term? Sounds like a brand of toilet paper. “Disunity, now softer for your delicate ass!” But that’s what we have. A society where everyone’s more connected than ever, but everyone’s more divided. Our political parties, racial groups, even neighbors. We can’t agree on anything. Not even the flavor of ice cream. Chocolate or vanilla? World War III, right in the ice cream shop.

Moving on to ‘E‘ for ‘Entitlement‘. It’s as if everyone’s got a golden ticket. “I’m entitled to this, I’m entitled to that”. Hell, some people feel they’re entitled to be offended by everything. Listen, buddy, the only thing you’re entitled to is a swift kick in the rear.

Then we have ‘I‘ for ‘Ignorance‘. It’s spreading faster than the flu in winter. It’s amazing how much information is available and how little people seem to know. But hey, ignorance is bliss, right? No, ignorance is just ignorance.

Next up, ‘A‘ for ‘Apathy‘. It’s everywhere. Growing pollution? Who cares! Corruption in politics? Whatever! It’s as if everyone’s just too damn tired to give a damn. Or maybe they’re just too busy scrolling through their social media feeds.

Now, ‘J‘ for ‘Judgment‘. Not the good kind. I mean the petty, superficial judgment. People judging others for their clothes, their jobs, their coffee orders. It’s as if the entirety of human worth can be measured in likes and retweets.

And last but not least, ‘B‘ for ‘Bureaucracy‘. It’s like a bad case of constipation. Everything’s backed up. Things that should take a week take a year. Forms, red tape, more forms. The only thing that moves fast in bureaucracy is the buck being passed around.

So there you have it, folks. The ‘alphabet critique’. The worst part? We could do this all day. I didn’t even get to ‘C’ for ‘Censorship’, ‘F’ for ‘Fake News’, or ‘Z’ for ‘Zealous Idiots’. But hey, one letter at a time. After all, we wouldn’t want to cause any ‘Disunity’.