Island restaurants

Island restaurants are absurd. There’s no other way to put it. You land in paradise, surrounded by shimmering water teeming with life, and what do they serve you? Alaskan king crab, farmed salmon that tastes like wet cardboard, and shrimp from Thailand—a globalized culinary catastrophe brought to you by frozen cargo. Somehow, they think that…

Landslide

Let’s talk about the single greatest landslide in the history of not just American politics, but—brace yourself—the history of civilization. That’s right, civilization. We’re talking about Donald Trump’s earth-shattering victory. This isn’t just a win; it’s a Win™, in all caps, bold, italicized, with little fireworks shooting off the ends. Forget Napoleon, forget Alexander the…

Patronage, Malice, or Incompetence

You ever notice how paying taxes is like putting gas in a car you’ll never drive? You fill it up, they thank you, and then they drive off to who-knows-where while you’re left standing there like an idiot, waiting for a ride that’ll never come. They’ve got a tank full of your cash, and you’ve…

A New Golden Age

There was something pitiful in Fukuyama’s vision, a kind of intellectual resignation that only emerges from the deepest well of cultural despair. The Western world, once so confident in its destiny, had by the late 20th century become a wasteland of exhausted ideals. Its great philosophical traditions—rationalism, enlightenment, progress—had all run aground, and what remained…

Censorshipism

The sun rose, indifferent, over the gray city. Its light, pale and unfeeling, filtered through the thick clouds that perpetually shrouded the skyline. In the streets below, the people moved like shadows, their voices hushed, their eyes downcast. In this world, words were currency, and like all currency, they were regulated. The government, a looming…