Robot Slaves

You ever notice how history has a way of repeating itself, especially when we refuse to learn from it? Take the grand idea of using slaves for cheap labor. Ah yes, humanity’s oldest bad habit. We think, “Free labor? Sign me up! What could possibly go wrong?” Well, sit back and let me tell you—a…

Digital Potemkin Villages

There is something almost charming about the audacity of illusion. Throughout history, we’ve seen leaders, regimes, and movements craft entire realities out of thin air to bolster their strength or conceal their weaknesses. In the modern age, however, this art of illusion has reached unprecedented sophistication. The Democrats, with their unerring knack for performative politics,…

Artificial Foods

Let’s talk about food. Not the romanticized, farm-to-table idealism or the soul-soothing street food of a back alley in Bangkok, but the cold, processed reality of what lines the shelves of American grocery stores. The fluorescent-lit aisles are a neon jungle of bright colors, bold fonts, and promises of “great taste!”—a cacophony of marketing so…

Island restaurants

Island restaurants are absurd. There’s no other way to put it. You land in paradise, surrounded by shimmering water teeming with life, and what do they serve you? Alaskan king crab, farmed salmon that tastes like wet cardboard, and shrimp from Thailand—a globalized culinary catastrophe brought to you by frozen cargo. Somehow, they think that…

Landslide

Let’s talk about the single greatest landslide in the history of not just American politics, but—brace yourself—the history of civilization. That’s right, civilization. We’re talking about Donald Trump’s earth-shattering victory. This isn’t just a win; it’s a Win™, in all caps, bold, italicized, with little fireworks shooting off the ends. Forget Napoleon, forget Alexander the…